Name: Park Hotel am Berliner Tor
Address: Borgfelder Str. 1-9, Hamburg

Superb

Would I stay there again?...

Liked: Credit where credit’s due—the housekeeping staff deserve a solid 10 out of 10. Honestly, I wouldn’t have been surprised to find them polishing the air. The room was spotless and magically reset every day like some sort of hospitality Hogwarts.The bed was comfortable—like, “Oops I accidentally napped for four hours” comfortable.Location-wise, it was pretty sweet—close enough to public transport that even someone with my sense of direction (or lack thereof) could make it into the city without accidentally ending up in the next country.
Disliked: The room was small—like, “I’ve-seen-bigger-elevators” small. If it had just been me, I could’ve managed by doing the occasional sideways shuffle. But with two of us? Let’s just say we were one sneeze away from becoming conjoined twins.There was no air conditioning, just a lone fan doing working as hard as it could. Bless its little heart.Now, the bathroom—oh dear. Calling it a "bathroom" feels generous. It was more like a phone booth with plumbing. And if you needed the toilet, you had to engage in a full-blown tango with the door. Step to the side, quick spin, raise a knee, duck your head—and maybe, just maybe, you’d land on the seat. Not for the faint of heart or inflexible of limb.